The Wisdom of the Sands

This ancient Sufi story of a stream who couldn't cross a desert because it didn't want to give up being a stream really give us a glimpse into life doesn’t it? People, every culture, age, belief system, geography and socio economic group experience the challenge of facing identity and greatness while remaining unwilling to let go of who we think we really are. The fundamentals of our lives - the children born through us, the mirrors we attract through relationships, culture and networks, the challenges of job titles, enterprise, business and career and the physical universe of body, home, finances and possessions are not who we are but rather reflections of the light around us. It is our essence as water and not as a particular form such as a stream that is the truth of us.

In the 21 Century, we feel powerless -the pace of change and a sense of an uncertain future is relentless. Everyone is met with constant internal and external forces that cause challenges, uncertainty and stress. Life is filled with frequent turning points - constant changes in our careers or finances, retirement, changes in our families and lifestyles. All of these challenges are a desert providing us with the opportunity to see our greatness. This story is telling us quite clearly that the strategies that our identities we apply to our lives continue to keep us away from our truth and our greatness.This is a story about transformation.

The Wisdom of the Sands

A stream, from its source in far away mountains passing throughevery kind and description of countryside at last reaches the sands of the desert.Just as it had crossed every other barrier, the stream tried to cross this one too.

But it found that as it flowed into the sands, its waters simply disappeared.It was convinced however, that its destiny was to crossthis desert as well, and yet - there was no way.

Now, a hidden voice, coming from the desert itself, whispered: the wind crosses the desert, and so can a stream.The stream objected that it was only dashing itselfagainst the sands and being absorbed; that the wind could fly,and this was why it could cross the desert, but How can I?

By hurtling in your own accustomed way, you cannot get across.You will either disappear or become a marsh;you must allow the wind to carry you over to your destination,replied the desert. But how can this happen? asked the stream.

By allowing yourself to be absorbed into the wind, the desert replied.This idea was not acceptable to the stream,after all - it had never been absorbed before,it did not want to lose it's individuality!And once having lost it, how was one to know if it could ever be regained?

The wind, said the whisper, performs this function.It takes up the water and carries it over the desert and then lets it fall again.Falling as rain, the water again becomes a river.But, how can I know that this is true? protested the stream.It is so! replied the whisper, and if you do not believe it,you cannot become more than a quagmire,and even that could take many, many years.

In any case,it will certainly not be the same as being a stream! But, asked the stream, can I not just stop hereand remain the same stream I am today?You cannot, in any way, remain the same, whispered the desert sands. Movement is your very nature. It will never cease until your true destination has been reached.

When the stream deeply considered this,echoes of the truth began to arise in its mind. Yes, this is true.He understood that this was the only real and intelligent thing to do.And the stream raised its vapors into the welcoming arms of the wind,which gently and easily bore it upwards and along, letting it fallsoftly as soon as it reached the roof of the distant mountains.

It was now able to remember its prior dilemma in the desertand now realized the goal of its long journey,its true identity and the deathless nature of its true being.And this is why, it is said, that the way by which the stream of lifecrosses the desert of this world, is written in the sands.


So let’s look at the story again.

What is it saying to us?

What is obvious?

A stream, from its source in far away mountains, passing through every kind and description of countryside at last reaches the sands of the deserts. Just as it had crossed every other barrier, the stream tried to cross this one too. But it found that as it flowed into the sands, its waters simply disappeared. It was convinced however, that its destiny was to cross this desert as well, and yet - there was no way.Now we must go into every drop of this story and sip every part of it.

“A stream from its source in far away mountains”
You are a stream of consciousness that has flowed from its source far away in the mountains. The mountains represent the source - your origin and your flowing is the journey you have been on. You have always been in existence. You have always been this great continuity; this stream of conscious experience - journeying from the mountains and the source of its origin.

“Passing through every kind and description of countryside”You have passed through every form of life. You have been a tree; you have been a rock; you have been an insect, you have been a fish; you have been a bird; you have been a squirrel in a tree; you have been male and you have been female. You have been a cow and you have been a tiger. You have passed, in your journey, through all kinds of descriptions and countryside’s. Over all kinds of rocks, through all kinds of countryside; you are a great continuity, and you have moved through all kinds of barriers.

Finally, your journey has brought you to face your truth and to the sands of the desert. Just as you had crossed every other barrier, you will try to cross this one too - with the same old strategies that you have been using in the past. When you encounter your truth, your response is out of the same "old conditioning" that you have become accustomed to. These are your values, your beliefs, and your mythology. Now out of your same old strategies, you will try to solve the problem of the desert.

The desert represents a crisis. Sooner or later, your stream of consciousness is bound to encounter the desert - an obstacle. This desert however is unlike any obstacle or barrier that you have ever encountered before. It is crisis as well as a great opportunity for growth!

The Chinese have a beautiful ideogram for the word crisis – not in words but in ideograms (pictures). The ideogram for the word crisis consists of two smaller pictures - one representing danger and the other one represents opportunity - because a crisis is both! This is an opportunity to make a quantum leap and "transcend" all of your prior conditioning. It is only dangerous and life-threatening if you apply the same old strategies because they will no longer work. This is the beauty of the desert.

At some point in your life you will reach a crisis. When all of your strategies to make yourself happy have failed, you have entered into the desert. Nothing that you have tried in the past is working anymore - in spite of all your efforts; in spite of all your calculations and in spite of your activities - you simply remain miserable, bored and minimally satisfied. But still, you go on trying to use the same old strategies to solve what is a very new situation. You start Personal Development. You go to seminars and courses and study philosophy and wisdom. Still nothing works because you are using old strategies to solve a new situation. You are still filtering your new information through your old strategies.

You know you have entered the desert when those same old strategies that have enabled you to get through all the obstacles and barriers in your life up to this point no longer work. In the past you were able to "solve" it with a little more food; a little more sex; a little bit more money; a little more health; another husband; another wife; a little bit more information - and you were able to continue to flow and get past it.

In the past, these strategies have worked for you. Any planning or action at this point is tethered to your old strategies and WILL NOT WORK.Here you face your demons knowing some part of you must die so you can cross the desert.

You are facing a death of your identity in order to reach your greatness.You can go on trying to "console" yourself with mythology. Meditation and prayer keeps you looking for more consolation. As the stream flowed into the sand, it found its waters simply disappeared. The more you try to console yourself, the less consoled you become!

Now all of your strategies - all of your moves - simply disappear into the sands of truth. This truth is so awesome that, in spite of your best efforts to console and mythologize yourself, you simply fail. All of your strategies are just like water flowing into the sand! Somewhere deep down inside of you, you will admit there is no way for you to continue being the same person you were prior to reaching this desert.

"The wind crosses the desert, and so can a stream." The stream objected that it was only dashing itself against the sands and being absorbed; that the wind could fly, and this was why it could cross the desert. You realise that the desert is the problem. Every problem contains its answer and it "whispers" the solution to you, but you must listen to it. A whisper has arisen out of the desert - out of the situation itself - and it is showing the stream the way across the desert.

Your anger, greed, envy, disappointment, attachment, vanity, suffering, lust, fear, shame – all your identity labels and traits tell you much about yourself. They are a part of your biography. See the activity that is producing the suffering. Listen to the whispers in the crisis of your life for they contain the keys that are the solutions to all of your problems. The answer is always in the problem! By avoiding, denying the problem, trying to console and anesthetize yourself, you actually hold onto the problem.

The desert brings with it a void - meaningless and so much without purpose - you feel like you must die to it. This is your higher self asking you to face your demons so that your IDENTITY can die.Now a hidden voice coming from the desert itself whispers, "the wind crosses a desert and so can a stream." The moment you encounter your truth and greatness, you object and cling to so called logic. But at some point, this argumentative nature of yours must cease. At some point it must cease, if you are to grow. You cannot spend your whole life arguing and objecting, while your "waters" are disappearing into the sands. The stream objected that it was only dashing itself against the sands and being absorbed; that the wind could fly and this was why it could cross the desert. But how can I?

"By hurtling in your old accustomed way, you cannot get across. You will either disappear or become a marsh. You must allow the wind to carry you over to your destination", replied the desert. "But how can this happen", asked the stream? "By allowing yourself to be absorbed into the wind", the desert replied. This idea was not acceptable by the stream. After all, it had never been absorbed before. It did not want to lose its individuality. And once having lost it how was one to know if it could ever be regained.

Living in your belief system, you will not be able to cross this desert. You will not be able to achieve happiness in your current hierarchy of values. In your old accustomed ways, and with all of your standard strategies, you cannot cross this desert of unhappiness. You will simply become a marsh.

"You must allow the wind." The wind is the truth. You must allow this wind to absorb you. We are all clinging to this sense of being a separate self holding onto this illusion of being separate from existence. Our senses perceive that we are separate. We feel that we are individual, independent, existing as a parallel line with existence. Now here's a question – what will be absorbed? What are you giving up? Your ego, individuality, illusion, fantasy and mythology? What is that? Nothing – you made it all up. You have nothing to lose. What you think you have will be merely TRANSFORMED.

Just like the wind, you will be absorbed as a stream and carried over the desert, and then let fall again. Falling as rain, the water again becomes a river. But, asked the stream, can I not simply stay here; stop here and remain the same stream I am today? "You cannot, in any way, remain the same. Movement is your very nature. It will never cease until your true destination has been reached.

When the stream deeply considered this, echoes of the truth began to arise in its mind. Yes, this is true. He understood that this was the only real and intelligent thing to do. The whisper has seen many streams come to the desert and has seen how all the streams had to enter into the process of condensation - and how the wind lifted their essential waters and carried them across. How would you analyze that which you have not experienced? You have not experienced life after death. How are you analyzing it? You are in the same position as a blind man trying to analyze light; a deaf person trying to analyze music. The proof is in the experience. You must have the experience. There is no way to prove to a blind man that light is all around. With or without proof, the crisis of the desert remains.

"But, asked the stream, can I not stop here and remain the same stream that I am today?" The stream's question is also your question. "You cannot in any way remain the same, whispered the desert sands. Movement is your very nature. It will never cease until your true destination has been reached." You are a stream of consciousness. Even on a daily basis, you never remain the same! This morning, when you woke up, maybe you were in a good mood. You were feeling alright! Driving into the office encountering road rage, then you start feeling a different way. You live in a state of transformation. You are never the same. It is in the nature a river to flow. It is in the nature of a human being that its conscious experience keeps moving.

It is in your nature to move and this journey will not end until you've reached your final destination and until you become who you truly are, this river of consciousness that you are will continue to flow. You have already flowed through many different personality structures.

"And the stream raised its vapors into the welcoming arms of the wind, which gently and easily bore it upwards and along, letting it fall softly as soon as it reached the roof of the distant mountains. The stream responded intelligently and it raised its awareness, attention and energy. Nothing to do but action to take."Letting it fall softly as soon as it reached the roof of the distant mountain." Remove yourself from the whole drama of ego activity. Condense your essence, let go and allow the wind to carry you.

You had been thinking all the debris was part of you, and you had been clinging to it. What is it that is motivating your clinging? It's because you don't want to die! It is being misidentified with the form (this body-mind) that we are in, which makes us cling to it and fear death. You mistakenly cling to your body-mind however your identity is stuff you have collected – habits, likes, dislikes, preferences, opinions, judgments. None of this is essential – its all made up. You carry it as debris in the stream that is you.

It is only when you arrive in awareness, back into the domain of self-realization that you truly realize "I was never that thing that I was calling me." The thing that I was clinging to - calling it me - that was never me, at all. I have always been this "pure" consciousness of experience. I can be whatever I want. All I have to do is make it up. See it and it will be. And to live in my greatness, all I need to do is allow myself to be carried by the wind, accept my transformation into whatever form, and simply be.

Ultimate Wonder of the World

Travelling throughout the globe exposes us to the ancient and modern man made and natural wonders of the world. Infused between religion, mythology, art, nature, and science, we marvel at the great pyramid of Giza, Stonehenge, the Great Wall of China, Taj Mahal, Grand Canyon, Machu Picchu and Everest.

Yet the ultimate wonder of the world, the human body, requires no passport, travel insurance or first class ticket. There is no need to queue for access to view this wonder as we take it with us wherever we go. Look closely at its refined construction and intricate detail. We are the finest examples of design and craftsmanship incorporating elements from every architectural style. Our bodies are museums preserving history and culture in temples housing the most magnificent sacred beings.

Imagine taking a vacation to visit this wonder and researching, visiting, admiring and photographing as if on a guided tour to a sacred site on a one in a lifetime trip. What would you see? What would you appreciate?

How often do we look at ourselves in the mirror and play the “I AM” game? I am fat. I am wrinkled. I am freckled. I am tall. I am ugly. What are we seeing to play that game?

Let’s start with the definition of a game. Known to have been played as far back as prehistoric times, games are a universal part of human experience and present in all cultures. A game is an activity with some rules engaged in for an outcome.

Who wrote those rules for what a human body should look like?

My facilitator brain tells me that my body is perfectly in balance. I accept that for the comfort it provides me. As I also know that my body contains thousands of systems, logic dictates that these systems maintain equilibrium. But how about when I look in the mirror? What do I see?

Like most human beings, I see someone else’s value system looking back at me in disapproval. I see everything I dislike about my physical structure. There are things I DO like about my body however I never see them first. Why is that?

When we do a love list for our bodies, we get the opportunity to really see every part of our physical structures. In listing what we love we get to experience the beauty of us in those parts. In listing what we do NOT love we get the opportunity to appreciate the benefits of those perceptions.

For example. I am fat. I am. My body carries a protective layer of extra fat. I do not like it. How can I appreciate the beauty in that? Ugh

To start with, was I always fat? No. I have been beautiful and thin. What changed? I felt threatened, in danger and in need of protection. Various events at a critical time in my life reinforced my particular mythology of not being safe and since then I have maintained this protective layer to look after me. Where did this mythology come from? Like every other human being - my birth.

My mythology – my theology – is that I am the protector, the warrior, Penthesilea and Boedicia – an Amazon who fights battles, protects, comforts, nurtures, preserves, serves, saves and loves fiercely. The language that I use in my everyday life provides clues to this myth if you listen closely enough.

Whatever the story is, you and I have both made it up – it is an assumption, a perception, a belief – a mythology. Yet we carry this mythology within our bodies as a museum preserves its history and experience. Our perceptions filter from our senses. If we chose to create this mythology, it is only because our senses identified a need to do so in the first place.

So we have our mythology. How do we therefore appreciate the history of our physical structure?
When did it feel good to be protected?
The comfort in the Tim Tams I ate.
What were the benefits to me in this protection?
I was protected from further sexual harassment while I was gigging and broke a very dangerous sexual addiction which I was very uncomfortable about within myself.
How has this served me?
I stayed in my business, marriage, home and family life instead of running away with various men whose offers of adventure and romance would have previously been irresistible.
How has this enabled me to receive?
Time for relationships with my children, love from my family and friends, financial security, business opportunities and inspiration and motivation for my various academic, creative, spiritual and artistic pursuits.
How has this afforded me the opportunity to play?
Staying in the same space and time for the development of relationships has provided me with a deep foundation in my business and finances which in turn has provided me with the freedom to travel wherever and whenever I want.
How has this helped me to participate?
Just by being here I have participated in the many lives of the people around me: children, parents, family, friends, staff, networks and communities.
How has this opened my heart?
My heart has guided me through various emotional challenges and the many perceived rejections because of my self judgment about my external aesthetics have provided me with the opportunity of truly opening my heart to myself.

This fat has kept me safe, comforted, protected, present and real. It has kept me here in this space. How could I not feel gratitude for this gift that I have given myself? I would not change one moment of my fat experience. I greatly value and appreciate it. Being fat has not detracted from my beauty at all in fact I love my face more now. I’m not bony and hard and brittle. I am soft, mushy, comfortable and sexy as hell. Having a fatter body is also pretty hot while making love – very horny and a major turn on. (Yep thats way too much information)

Creation is dualistic in nature therefore the pendulum also swings the other way and there are just as many things that I appreciate and love about my body. Identifying these things I love and feeling grateful for them opens my heart. Opening your heart has a physical affect on your molecular structure. You feel better. You feel lighter. When you are light, the energy around you flows through you. You become a part of everything.

"Everything is dual; everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the same; opposites are identical in nature, but different in degree; extremes meet; all truths are but half-truths; all paradoxes may be reconciled." -The Kybalion.

No matter who you are, you have things you like and dislike, or even admire and despise about yourself. Both things you like and dislike are going to serve you in your life, and the wisdom is appreciating this balance and being grateful for it. Our bodies are museums preserving history and culture in temples housing the most magnificent sacred beings. To love it is to appreciate what is assumed to be attractive and repulsive and simply salute the god and goddess within yourself and BE.

The Piece Mastered

The more time I spend with you
the less I know you.

There are degrees
secreted
under tiers
inside levels
on top of stratums
around corners.

Pockets of you
hidden
all
over
the
place.

I wonder about whether
we
all
subconsciously
choose to create
what we think
we need
and
yearn for?

Our own private little Universes.

Do we seek to replace
what
we reject
by giving birth,
accumulating
friends,
partners
or even
enemies?

How much
do
we create
the
accidents of genetics?

The ultimate
design of life
management,
the patterned webs
woven
unconsciously,
these
are
the things,
which
slowly
reveal us.

Yesterday
I viewed
your
shapes and colours
as
exquisite and brilliant.

You are a talented artist
who has painted
a brutal yet engaging
self-portrait
of me
through
you.

I cannot look away
and
almost
covet the flow of your brushstrokes.

They expose your beauty
and
scare me.

It is a privilege to bear witness to you in full control of this masterpiece.

Becoming Unstuck

I've been really feeling stuck for the past month. So stuck in fact that I havent been able to function in the business of my life as I usually can. The pattern in my life has been to suppress my STUCKEDNESS and just keep going as a responsible member of humanity is supposed to do right?

Well, during the month of May, it became impossible to continue to just keep going as per usual.

I didnt sleep. Sobbing occupied midnight to 6am. I avoided intimacy on every level. I experienced major panic attacks when my boys played rugby. I completely rejected one of my son's in my life. I worked day and night only going home to sleep. I avoided as many social activities as possible. Not only was I uninspired, however I couldnt even muster up any MOTIVATION to go to work at the office or do any sort of housework at home. In social situations that I dragged myself alone to, I became contraversial, obnoxious, drinking way too much and simply didnt bother with my usual nurturing of the group. I felt lost, alone and unloved.

All this time I worked with OTHERS to balance these very feelings. Yet my balance was lopsided.

I owned a house in the city - a very old heritage cottage which - yes - it is haunted. We moved our business into the top level - great location - heaps of space - a very funky office. The more time I spent there the more I noticed more activity with Vincent, our resident ghost energy. (the name just seemed to fit - no idea where it came from)The noises, scraping, scratching, banging and chilliness escalated and the business and the team began to experience unusual negative transformations.

A friend of mine who is a kinesiologist and a trained Hindu/Buddhist master gave his opinion about our experiences with Vincent. In his philosophy, Tibetans believed that in death, a soul trapped in between the dimensions is stuck in a state of flux. Perhaps when Vincent died he was infatuated and/or resentful and this kept him trapped and stuck in this energy field of flux - in this house - for whatever reason. Thoughts, (our logic), Feelings (our emotions) and Sensations (our physical body senses) hold vibration and frequency. Perhaps his fearkept him STUCK in between living and dead? Never having died, I have no clue - just making this stuff up!

As a certified facilitator in The Demartini Method®, I have been trained in how Infatuation and Resentment are powerful motivators, balancing each other and serving to cycle our behaviour. The Demartini Method® is designed to balance the charge of the infatuation/resentment, raise the vibration to an equilibrium and becoming light so I figured I would use the method on Vincent by surrogating myself with fascinating results.

Vincent was mirroring ME where I have been feeling stuck. This was actually all about me and Vincent was MY surrogate. So I used the TDM on myself and faced my own demons. It took me a while to do it, but when I embraced my own darkness in this house I no longer saw that it was dark and actually felt more of my own light and the power of THAT was overwhelming. I was SO afraid of my power and allowed myself to believe a mythology that was a lop sided perspective and only 50% correct. When I owned the space and gave Vincent the options of becoming light or flesh, I was actually opening myself up to my OWN options.

When the exercise was complete, I walked through the house and felt safe, light and at peace for the first time in my experience of it. For the first time I did not feel like anyone was watching me as I left the office.

The following morning, upon arrival, the office was in darkness a it had lost power during the night. Whether this had something to do with the rain or Vincent's energy transformation or MINE, I have no answer. However I "felt" different - Brave somehow, and peaceful.

Thanks Vincent for showing me where I felt "stuck"!

The Secret Is There Is No Secret

Ssssshhhhhhhhhhhh don’t tell anyone – it’s a SECRET!!!! And only you know!!!

Its funny - my brother and sister in law called me yesterday to say they just watched The Secret.
My children are now talking about it and everywhere I go, I hear people raving or bagging about it. For a while there I was caught up in the infatuation that maybe humanity was becoming more open to Universal and Natural Laws and that we were preparing globally to face the next five years in a greater state of enlightenment.

With the globe going crazy for The Secret, and all these media shows gunning for the Philosophers with equal fervent, I realized that perhaps we - humanity ARE heading for
an interesting shift - a transformation.

Remember the Law of Conservation – we have what we have – nothing more and nothing less.
Nothing is missing and nothing changes – it is already here in another form. Is it possible that the so called New Age Philosophy is actually all about this Transformation process?

The Law of Cause and Effect dictates that there is a balance – a natural law balance 50/50 – Yin and Yang – Day and Night – Up and Down. To know yourself, to know life is to understand universal and natural law. Natural Law needs the system and Universal Law provides the balance – the duality – the polarity. These laws are Philosophy and Science.

The Law of Cause and Effect is a Universal and Natural Law.
For one thing, It explains the Holy Trinity Game: The Victim, the Perpetrator and the Hero.
Eg You caused me this effect with your action.
Either I am hurt (victim), I hurt (perpetrator) or I stopped the hurt (hero)

Consider that We are all three.
Consider that We have been all three.
Consider that We will continue to be all three.

Whichever part you play in that game is a matter of perspective. This is the great paradox of life. This is one of The Secrets. This Holy Trinity Game is played when we live our life in judgement.We live our lives in judgement 50% of the time. A Judgement is a label that identifies a trait so we can understand it and manage it in a system. Every system requires labels. Life also requires us to dissolve labels and see ourselves as the SAME as everyone else.

This is the Law of Polarity and Duality.

Apply this to The Secret.

50% will infatuate The Secret and expect it to work without really understanding
the science. After a while, when things don’t CHANGE in the form they ASKED for, they will sink into a deep depression or resentment. (Depression is the manifestation of an unfulfilled Infatuation.)

50% will resent it and bag it straight away. People playing the Holy Trinity Game will pounce on so called New Age concepts like The Secret. Why? Because they feel RESPONSIBLE for others to tell them the truth. RESPONSIBLE = HERO – Truth – whose truth? There is the ego truth and the universal truth. TRUTH – Universal – may be perceived differently to the ego truth. Both truths are TRUTH. Playing the Holy Trinity Game is part of playing the Human Game. It provides an important balance.

Perhaps in approx 18 to 24 months a shift will occur in the 50% who infatuate The Secret. If it doesn’t work and doesn’t manifest and attract what we want, how will we feel?
For The Secret to have an impact, study and understanding is a pre requisite of the universal laws of duality, polarity and quantum physics (to name but a few) by first identifying and labeling and then collapsing judgment, in line with Life’s paradox, while living in gratitude and faith. (This concept is the basis of every theology that has ever been expressed. This is NOT a new concept.)

The infatuation % will actually have a greater % of perceived failures and the disappointment and resentment will create a greater resentment % than the original 50% who resented it in the first place. Those resentment 50% will gradually grow in appreciation of the same concepts but in a different form until both % are balanced with transformed beliefs.

The balance AFTER The Secret frenzy dies down is that it will be that the same % of people who study The Ologies, seek enlightenment (for want of a better word) and are willing to do the research and work will remain the same.

The benefits are that humanity gets the opportunity to raise its global frequency in alignment with the increase of the earths hum and balance the dying religion numbers. The drawbacks are that popular culture (movies, TV, art, and music) will be released to balance The Secret mania that will be reflecting darker and blacker frequencies. Become aware of popular television concepts and the ratio of horror movie releases. The more positive humanity becomes, the more we attract equilibrating events around the world to most certainly bring us all back to earth with a thud.

Therefore all will remain in order as it always has been and always will be. Nothing will change, a transformation will occur in our perspectives. That is what The Secret is all about - a Transformation. There is a Power to Positive Thinking and there is also a Power to Negative Thinking. BOTH are in order. Never expect to just think POSITIVE. Consider that when it is day light in Australia, it is Night in Italy. Both sides of the planet can NEVER be daylight at the same time. This is a natural law. There are benefits and drawbacks for BOTH.

The Secret is there IS NO SECRET. There IS NO rapid answer or quick fix. The Law of Attraction is true insofar as interconnectivity defines the universe. As a society, we do not have time to read philosophy, to engage in esoteric discussions, or to formulate theories. Even psychotherapy is too long and too costly an undertaking. We want the ready-made, the microwaved, the heat-and-serve, the wash-and-wear; we do not want to be bothered with serious study and careful analysis. We want answers at a discount, nicely packaged and ready to go. And that's what The Secret is all about. Ingenious marketing for the masses! I appreciate it and love Rhonda Byrne’s work!! Good on her!

My only suggestion is that she re markets it THE SECRET PART ONE. Then balance it with PART TWO so audiences can see the OTHER SIDE of the planet and therefore 100% of the picture.

The real secret is that all this New Age stuff that people love to ridicule and find so amusing is actually for real. Just like every major religion is at its core, before they've been perverted through the centuries. Quantum physics has tied together all the mysteries of consciousness that have been explained by Ancient cultures since the dawn of time.

Ssssshhhhhhhhhhhh don’t tell anyone – it’s a SECRET!!!! And only you know!!!

When in Italy

Italy - ah - get a dictionary - find all the adjectives - positive and negative - line them all up beside each other like dominos - and that pretty much tells you how it was.
First week and the Eurogate workshop were challenging confronting and unbelievable. Lake Como and the surrounding villages were like a fairytale with sledgehammer beauty. I uttered many a Bellismo upon my arrival. How embarrassment to have such a limited vocabulary. he he he. The language barrier really posed a challenge as I simply couldn't communicate with anyone and that bothered me no end. I realise that that is my THING - I need to communicate comprehensively and I couldn't charm impress or amuse anyone in English. So it was SI - GRAZIE - and lots of smiling. The flashing of cleavage also helped much. :-)

I detoxed from Diet Coke - 19 days fog free - yeah!!! So my first few days in Como were migraine and nausea filled but it was worth it! Everything closes in Italy from midday until 4pm for the traditional midday gluttinous pig out. 2nd day - I ran out of panadol at 12.30pm and freaked out that I couldn't find a Farmaccia that was open. By 4pm I was in a bad state - I no longer attempted to be polite in Italian - the chemist took one look at me - Hair askew, eyes hanging down to my kneed and in unstylish dishevellment - I very slowly and firmly said MAL DE TESTA COMPRESSOH PER FAVORE getting louder with each word. He rambled something back in fast Italian and all I could do was grab his shirt and repeat myself dramatically. He grabbed a box of something and escorted me out the door. He he he!!! I mustve looked a fright. I took 3 pills and slept for 16 hours missing my first bit of the workshop. chemical haze.................yeah...........

Every person I met in Como was a significant actor in my particular illusion matrix - I met spiritual healers, practitioners, speakers, trainers, actors, alchemists, magicians, witches, artists and enlightened beings. What a parada!

The second week was in Tuscany in a tiny isolated village - could have been the Himalayas it was so high and so removed from reality. Vellano is one of the 10 Castelli and over 1600 years old. I was submerged in the culture traditions customs and of course the Pasqua Easter festivals. It was brilliant. I loved being part of the community and totally existed on the kindness of strangers. I felt alive aligned and in tune with nature. Most of the old nonnas practice pagan craft so that was enlightening I tell you!!! My villa was inhabited by the ghost of the previous owner - a villager that was killed by the nazis in 1945. He wasnt malevolent just interested in getting my attention. Only 500 people living in the village and over each entrance door hung the freemasons symbol. Very interesting stuff happening in that place.

Third week in Florence was jam packed. I know that city back to front now. It has become my home town. They speak a little English there so it was easier. By the time I left the village however My Italian was markedly improved. However its not the words. It's the mythology the attitude the culture and the philosophy with their communication. It would take a lifetime to really communicate in their level. My hotel room in Florence opened up to a terrace which faced the Duomo one street away. Florence oozes Art Beauty History Language Culture from every pore. I was in heaven. Took a Chianti Winery Tour with a small group of people. The tour guide I'm sure had alzeimhers and kept forgetting what she was describing. "Here is a 12th century - ah - er - um - oh look theres a deer - ah - er - um - one day I found some beautiful irises - ah - er - where are we again?" OMG - she got us lost in the middle of Tuscany for two hours. The driver was objecting and she just bullied him into taking some obscure dirt road up some gorgeous mountain arriving in some unknown ancient village. How funny! Missed my italian cooking class that night as it took forever just to get back on track again on the tour.

Only in Italy.

Tuscany was settled by the Etruscans who had Greek origins. Florence therefore embraced a Neo Platonic philosophy in the renaisance era. I realised that this is an ancient version of The Secret. Which by the way was talked about by every single person I met!!! In the Uffizzi, I saw many signs and symbols used in the art which was masonic, kabbalistic and even illuminati!!! In the 18th century every single artist, author, scientist and enterpreneur in the western world hung out in Florence. The energy there is incredible - like living The Secret every second. It seeps from every pore in that city and in the people's attitude to life. Florentines expect beauty and wealth and dont accept anything outside of this illusion.

Challenges - I really felt homesick and missed the company and closeness of my children. Not being able to communicate and speak was a great challenge for me! I didnt realise just how much I love to talk. However I got to know myself very well, did heaps of writing and really enjoyed my own company. Yet wherever I went the Italians made such a big deal of a woman eating alone in a ristorante. That was uncomfortable. "Una?" and quickly remove the other cutlery with dramatic effect - ugh - I ate in this magical little café in front of Palazzo Vecchio - near the statue of David - and this waiter just continued with "Ah that's right its just you" "No shes alone" "Only one here" the entire meal. No tip from me. Couldve slapped him! :-) Met heaps of people though, many girls travelling alone yet no guys travelling alone. In fact had only two conversations with 2 guys the entire trip. Really learned so very much, had quite a number of mystical experiences (I actually went to church on Easter Sunday), was invited to speak at heaps of seminars coming up (Italy and Ireland) and really had a wonderful time.

Not one awful thing happened. Not one. The energy was balanced the entire time. One old nonna is the Vellano village declared that I must be protected by invisible angels as I had nothing but good fortune every moment.

Was it the magic of Italy or my magical belief about being in Italy?

Swimming between the flags of Intuition and Logic

I believe in the duality of life expressed in the form of a paradox, based on whatever belief system I currently subscribe to. My current paradox is to swim between the flags of logic and intuition.

Or is it?

Logic, from the classical Greek λόγος LOGOS (the word), is the study of patterns found in reasoning. Of course, it HAD to be Greek. Seems there is no escape for me from that culture! It has been argued that the task of the logician is to create a system for distinguishing between valid and misleading supposition. Logic is the adjudicator between rational and flawed arguments. (Why I was born into my family perhaps he he he....:-)

Traditionally, logic was studied as a branch of philosophy. In a proper scientific form, logic classifies the structure of statements and arguments, both through the study of formal systems of inference and through the study of arguments in natural language. Logic is a rather large and fluffy quilt fashioned with precisely woven squares covering myth, paradox, analysis, reason, probability and causality.

The concept of form is central to any discussions of the nature of logic. Formal, Informal, Platonic or Aristotelian terms – my logic is based on experience, perceptions and belief systems and ultimately can be analysed and expressed in the terms of some questionable Greek philosopher. Hmmm.

My external life casts shadows from those who suggest I am dangerously addicted to all things logical.

In contrast, however, Intuition is a gift I was born with and provides the balance to my structured, systematic logical nature. Intuition is a way of understanding and knowing immediately without any usual sensory or mental process. It is almost as if there is access to a universal energy through various senses. Some philosophers refer to intuition as a form of instinct. Others see it as a form of revelation. It could be an evolved consciousness providing the difference between description and acquaintance of logos. Is there a difference between psychic, insightful and intuitive?

Questions lead to answers that in turn lead to more questions.

The up shot is that I cannot provide a universal classification for the word INTUITION.

However I can describe what it means for me.

One form is attached to a specific place and can be repeated with subsequent visits.
From my earliest memories, I have encountered various energy grids throughout the world, where I can quite literally feel the universe flowing through me - a connection of sorts. The earth, river, sea, sand, air, stars, moon and especially trees all become part of the molecules that make up the frequency of ME and a dialogue is opened up between all of us.

Directly under the large fig tree that sleeps beside The Rocks and the Sydney Harbour, seated inside the Glastonbury Tor at the very base, the great fir trees that line the first wooden bridge you cross from the Switzerland border right before Lake Lugano in Italy, the lurching old swearing tree that held court at the rear of the family farm in Cooran where we as children and our children thereafter cursed sworn enemies, the Glasshouse mountains where my dad lives, the rolling hills of Bangalow where my grandmother grew up, standing high on the slopes of Bali's Mount Agung in the mother temple Pura Besakih, the tallest ancient red wood in the centre of the Muir Woods tourist trail, and two seemingly insignificant pine trees in Upper Mount Gravatt where we used to take evening walks – these are the places where the atoms in my body alter and shift and resonate in harmony with everything around me. As silly as it may sound, it feels like magic.

In these places and in this state, I have received information and inspirations in various forms and in diverse subjects. This is emptied onto endless pages of words awaiting form and order for eventual publication or simple eradication. Most of the time, however, this process is incomprehensible and I breathe it out into freedom.

The second form of Intuitive experience for me is the collection of items in my basket.

People in my life, permanent or fleeting, unknowingly send out transmissions of thought and feelings that for some reason I receive. Usually these feelings and thoughts are unwanted, rejected, unaccepted and more often than not, unconscious by the people who send the transmission. I hear and feel words and emotions – secrets and dreams, fears and plans. Occasionally my body will have a physical reaction in temperature, nausea or headache depending on the transmission. I therefore am careful to mentally collect each frequency of thought or feeling as a delicate white daisy with perfect blue centres to be carried in my basket until they can be loved, appreciated and released into an energy grid and eventual freedom.

I began collecting these flowers as a small child first from my mother. Over the years I have collected thousands. There is a definite pattern – a process that defines the intensity of the intuitive collections. Touching – making physical connection with one for whom I feel an enormous love, opens me up to a deeper tuning and I tend to carry and hold onto their daisies for a very long time. Everyone else’s flowers are released quickly into the universe when I am connected to everything and it all flows together.

At a certain point in my life I forgot which daisies were mine and which ones belonged to others and I have begun to declutter my basket and release the flowers that do not belong to me. The most stubborn flowers to release have been the ones I carried for my first love, my mother, and my last.

So for me, living with intuition is a privilege – a choice made with love, where trees talk to me, the earth groans under my feet and I have a direct connection to the thoughts and feelings of the people around me.

And now I can see that there is a certain logic to it all. :-)

Feel Good

Our weather is a little silly right now. Summer will hold on and humidity will hang in the air thick and low until rain finally gives in and decides to come and share its love and bring that vital water into our environment as promised. :-) (brown nosing potential rain - a new low I have sunk to)

All of this impacts on our wellbeing which means that our circulatory systems will be working overtime and totally out of alignment. More energy will be required to address the unbalance - hence your tiredness.

There are many nasty little lergies scurrying around us as we speak.All you need to fight any lergy is a strong immune system.However as we live here and now with all the 21st century pros and cons, the reality is that our immune systems are not working to their optimum levels.

First place to start to is feel good about yourself. Pamper yourself a little:

1. Long Bath - add some sandalwood and basil oils.Once you HAVE the lergy - boil 6 oranges and 2 ginger stalks (sliced and diced)add a very hot bath. Let yourself sweat and sting for 20 minutes.

2. Get a massage - head, whole body, feet, and hands - use geranium, ylang ylang, jasmine and bergamot oils

3. Pressure Points - 3 inches down from your knee cap - find the sore spot and massage and rub yourself every 30 minutes. Find the sore spot in between your thumb and pointer and massage and rub every other 30 minutes

4. If you have a lingering headache, relieve it by getting 2 buckets of boiling hot water, add 6 drops of lavender oils into each and place one foot into each bucket for 30 minutes or until you have to run to the toilet.

5. Drink herbal teas - peppermint, ginger, chamomile or plain hot water 6 times a day

6. Drink 4 litres of water each day.

7. Begin your day with fresh juice - carrot, ginger, apple, beetroot, pineapple, celery

8. Avoid caffeine, sugar, wheat and dairy

9. East Plenty of Fruit, Soup, Salad, Rice, Curry and Stir Fry

10. Take Echinacea or Olive Leaf Extract - 4 tablets every 4 hours

11. Drink one tablespoon of Swedish Bitters every 4 hours

12. Try to avoid panadol and antibiotics and cold tablets as they reduce the efficiency of your immune system by attacking your liver to take the bodies attention away from the congested bits. Distraction isn't a positive long term remedy for health.

13. Take Valerian if you really need to address pain.

14. MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL: Get some loving - hugs, caresses, kisses (Oh OK not if you are in full lergy swing) and tons of sex.

Feeling loved, wanted and believed in cures EVERYTHING

Fog Creeps

A dusty, open faced ceramic wall clock in the corner of the Nepali tea room declared the time as two o’clock in the afternoon. Clouds have descended over the military base like aliens waiting to pounce on an unsuspecting B grade American movie. The small hand on this timepiece takes an hour to move to the next number with ticking that only seems to become slower as the seconds pour themselves into being. Watching the clock won’t bring the planes in from Kathmandu today. The fog creeps over the distant mountain and twenty degrees fall in the expectant air around me. Watching the runway won’t get me home today.
As I search for a familiar face in this sea of military and trekking individuals, I wonder how, on the 1st day in December 2003, I found myself sitting alone, freezing and bewildered beside an empty air strip in Lukla, 2800 metres above sea level in the Himalayas.

Born in the US of A....not

One of my dreams as a child was always to travel.

Since 2000, I have achieved that dream part way and have visited quite a few countries - still many many more to go.

Looking back on my journals from the first big venture OS, I have to laugh at myself as I listed my greatest lessons at the time. We were all so small minded and the first adventure occuring in the United States of America was probably a good way to dampen the culture shock. Actually in every trip, going to the toilet has occupied MOST of the adventure!

Doors are pushed OUT to go IN
East is West - Right is Left
Toilets flush DOWN not UP unless of course Sam went first then call theHousekeeping.
Toilets flush themselves
Taps turn themselves ON and OFF
There are no bath plugs.
Lights switch UPAlways arrange for Tim to visit the Restroom FIRST and arrange for 20minutes of extra activity while waiting for him.
Check out your rental car in the FIRST day not the LAST day to locate thecup holders for the driver.
Keep no less than ten dollars worth of quarters on your person at alltimes.
Five cent coins are BIGGER than ten cent coins.
The Aussie dollar may be worth just over half a US dollar, but it STILLcosts FIVE DOLLARS to get ONE dollars worth of quarters for the laundry.
Australia is a small suburb somewhere in England."Your English is pretty good considering it's your second language - whatlanguage do you normally speak?".
Alex can and will be mistaken for an eleven-year-old who can obtain achild admission anywhere in the known civilised world.
There is no such thing as TOMATO SAUCE - only ketchup.
On American radio there are only two types of music played - LATINO andCOUNTRY.
Destiny's Child and 98 Degrees are IN (remember this is 2000)
Britney Spears and Backstreet Boys are OUT (ditto)
VAN HALEN will be forever included on American Radio Playlists.
The BIGGEST radio hit currently in LA goes like this: "Who let the DogOut - Woof Woof Woof Woof" (Repeat 20 times to hear the entire song) - eventually we ALL got to know this song in OZ didnt we?
Australian children have a genuine psychotic fear of parents who know allthe words to every 80's song played on the Highway Grand Canyon radio stationand who sing them LOUDLY for five hour stretches.
Always order coffee WITH milk and SUGAR if you don't want it black.
Orders must include one of the following: TO GO - ON THE SIDE - STRAIGHTUP
OVER EASY is about your eggs and not your personality.
Common Courtesy and politeness like Good Morning and Thank You areig nored.
A dollar Bill ALWAYS gets attention.
Another way of receiving attention is to drive down a one way street on the wrong side of the road...SLOWLY...
And always expect to meet the rudest most ignorant Hotel Manager on your
very last night in America - "No there are only TWO beds available - take it orleave it!" - and crying and yelling don't change a thing.

Welcome to America!!!

Magic Moments in Europe

Once you have traveled, the voyage never ends, but is played out over and over again in the quietest chambers, that the mind can never break off from the journey. " Pat Conroy from The Prince of Tides

I had the BEST time - even now - months later - I still feel excited at the thought of my trip. Great moments frozen in time:

Soccer Frenzy in Every Country
The Shooting Star over the Roof Terrace in Rome
Fireworks in Sorrento
Flower Sellers Face at the Trevi Fountain when I thanked his Mother (Oh bring it on beyattchhh!!!)
Realising in Amsterdam that Hollandaise sauce actually comes from Holland.
Spewing in Cologne
The smell of REAL strawberries in Switzerland
Hearing a German band sing ACDC
Looking for a fictional Beggar Woman in the streets of Venice
St Marks Square Venice at night - Tenors Singing, Medieval Buildings alight - the air was thick with beauty and love - and la bella luna e l'amore.
Swiss Band Chulee yodelling through We Will Rock You complete with accordion.
Looking for Sausages in Heidelberg
Texting Jody from Cannes while She is in Labour
Daily Seat Allocation on the Bus - very important to get it right! ach tung!
Testosterone explosion in Lucerne
Aussie guys picking up a small defenceless little car in Rome and moving it out of the way so that our bus could pass by.
Roman skin flick live cuming in a park near you!
Big Icky and Lil Icky
Cows with Beautiful Eyes in Switzerland
Finding a Magic Room FOR FREE!!

Tune into Me

Live in nature. Be still. Do nothing.
Learn the art of inner stillness.
Stillness provides space for the growth in our relationship.
Watch the moon.
Talk to a tree.
Listen to the rain.
Turn your mobile off, turn the TV off and tune into each other.
Tune into me while I tune into you.

It’s the Little Things

A small forgetfulness – Large anger, frustration and hurt.
Love doesn’t wait for public holidays or marketing opportunities.
Every day is to be celebrated.
There is no reason for celebration – so celebrate that!
Be on time.
Remember.
Put me first sometimes.
Let me put your first sometimes.
Surprise.
Do something unexpected.
Be kind.
We are the most important thing in the universe together

Less Is More

Less stress. Less work. Less rush. Less.
Plan.
Systemise.
Rationalise.
Prioritise.
Grow your love by appreciating your time together.
Daily Pillars of wisdom - “How can I take on more, and do it with less?”
Turn up for each other.
Not after, or when or if but NOW.
Make it happen.
Be there with more energy after work.
Measure the investment you make in this relationship.
Value this love.

Match Dreams

There are seven areas of life.
At any of these levels, we meld in love.
This is who we are.
Physical creates life.
Spiritual is life meaning.
Social integrates.
Mental educates.
Business mediates.
Financial facilitates.
Our relationship is the expression of our life and love together.
Link our values.
Match our dreams.

Find that balance

Live like you mean it.
Love like you’ve never been hurt.
Dance like no one is watching.
The business of life can never get in the way of our love.
Be true to love.
Love is your lifestyle.

Age of Aquarius

My sun is in Capricorn however my rising star is in Aquarius.

The piece of software that I laboured over for many years and became the bane of my existence was named Aquarius - by me - no idea where that came from.

John was the first Aquarian I had ever been in a relationship with. As it turned out, I wasnt - however time with an Aquarian certainly was an educational experience.

The legend is that we are living in the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.

Here is a little background to the previous ages.

The Age of Gemini (c.6000 - c.4000) corresponded to the flourishing period of early Hinduism. It was under this sign that Rama, the seventh incarnation of Vishnu was manifested by the birth of the two pair of brothers: Rama and Lakshmana on the one hand, Satrughna and Bharata on the other. Rama Himself had twin sons: Lav and Kush (in harmony with the name of the constellation where the Sun was at that time.) Lav went to Russia from this we get the name of Slav. The other son, Kush went to China, hence we get the name Kushan. These two divine principles were also incarnated as Buddha and Mahavira, then as Adi Shankaracharya and Gnyaneshwara.

The Age of Taurus (c.4000 - c.2000 B.C.).
The aeon governing this age was Krishna, the eight Avatar, the Lord of the cows (Govinda.) The age stayed under the sign of the bull (Apis, or sacred bull Mnevis of Helipolis, identified to Ra), of the holy cow (Hathor in Egypt, surahbhi or Kamadhenu in India or may be worshipped in many spiritual cultures), or the golden calf in the polytheistic beliefs (see Exodus 32:4), preceding the Judaic monotheism. Krishna was said to have lived at the end of Dvapara Yuga (Encyclopaedia Universalis, Paris 1968, vol. 9, p.711) considered by some to have ended in the year 3102 B.C. (Zimmer, quoted work.)

The Age of Aries (c.2000 - 1 B.C.) was characterized by the establishment of the monotheistic Judaism through great spiritual personalities like Abraham (19th century B.C.) and Moses (13th century B.C.). Generally, this period was dominated by the manifestation of the universal principle of the spiritual master (Adi Guru Dattatreya.) Indeed, before the Christian era, Zarathustra incarnated (7th or 6th or even 10th century according to some opinions), Confucius and Lao-Tse (6th century), Socrates (5th century), alongside with the two great Jewish prophets (see chapt. X.) The symbol of the ram (or the Passover lamb) appeared as an object of sacrifice instead of worship, as a reaction against the belief of the previous age. That could be illustrated by the cult of Mithra who stabbed the mythological bull.

The Age of Pisces (A.D. 1 - c.2000) during which Christianity appeared and spread out. The fish was known to have been the secret sign used by the early Christians to identify each other. The Greek word Ichtus (=fish) was made up of the following phrase capitals (acrostic): Iesous Christos Theou Uios Soter (=Jesus Christ Son of God, the Saviour.) In Hinduism it was also the symbol of the Saviour (Vishnu's first incarnation in the shape of a fish saved Manu from the flood)...Similar to Mahavishnu, Jesus represented the ninth Avatar, who opened the Agnya chakra within the Cosmic Being.

The Age of Aquarius (c.2000 ) starts at the dawn of Satya Yuga. The beginning of this age was estimated by various calculations around the year 2000. Some astrologers believe that mankind will step out of the mystical age of Pisces right into the luminous age of Aquarius between 2000 and 2050, which means the end of superstitions and of dogmatic religions .

Pluto, the mightiest of the planets, is the master of Scorpio until the beginning of the year 1995 and afterwards it will enter Sagittarius. It awakens the old demons to exorcize them completely and this cleansing will bring all the mud from the depths to the surface. The energy will serve to purify man, if it is well used; being perverted it will turn against him. Pluto in Scorpio indicates a token of life, death, rebirth. Then, it will enter Sagittarius, symbol of superior spirit, of metaphysical abstraction, of fundamental seeking.

The other three heavy planets will leave one after another Capricornus to enter Aquarius: Saturn in 1991, Uranus in 1996 and Neptune in 1999 indicating the entering of mankind into the age of Aquarius, generating a new awareness, a new spiritual order. In 1996 Uranus will enter Aquarius whose master it is. Thus, the dominion of materialism and selfishness will come to an end, leading at the same time towards a new society characterized by benevolence and universal integration. This will means the abolishing of the old concepts and the vanishing of any physical and spiritual frontiers.

If Pisces is a sign of water, Aquarius is much more so. Considering the last ages of the cycle, the transition from the zodiacal names of mammals to those of the aquatic beings can be interpreted as the tendency of returning to the Primordial Ocean along the regressive branch of the ellipse, meaning the absorption (dissolution) back into the Original Atom from where the cycle had started. The Age of Aquarius is interpreted as the water of life pouring upon the people (the Kundalini), of the Spirit, of the Holy Ghost, in sign of harmony between the human microcosm and the divine macrocosm.

Time will tell, :-)

Under a New Moon

I stand under a new moon.

My memories have rained with fire as my heart bellowed and exploded.
I followed Mintaka and looked beneath the dying embers of the once green flame.

I am a shining flame and can light my own darkness whenever needed. My wings are perfectly formed and are strong. My breath is deep and free. My tears are no longer for you. My tears are no longer.

I am alive. I survived the flames.

There is a new dream and a new star to align myself with. If it changes direction, I will not be lost. I will merely choose another. There are billions of stars above me just waiting to be wished upon.

My voice is filled with harmony and my song is sweet. The circle around me is filled with light.

I am fate. I decide.

Mille and the Bird

High in a tower hiding behind an overhanging jagged rocked mountainside, in a small room at the very top, lived a beautiful woman.

No fairytale name such as Rapunzel or Beauty or Belle - she was simply Mille and she had been the prisoner of an evil haggard old witch for a very long time.

Mille had no recollection of how long she had been imprisoned or how she had even been captured in the first place.

All she knew were the four faces of the moon, the four colours of the leaves of the one tree outside her tower and the movement of the stars that watched with her as she waited in her small room. The only voice she ever heard had been the wind as it howled, sang, whispered and coo-ed through the seasons.

One morning she awoke in the small room at the very top of the tower and looked out her window down at the overhanging jagged rocked mountainside and over the grey barren valley at the foot of the mountain. The leaves on the trees had burnt orange and yet the morning mist still hung insistently from each one. Mille could hear the wind as it coo-ed and aah-ed its good morning.

Today however the wind was almost singing.

It's not yet time for a wind song, thought Mille, the leaves have two other shades to grow before then and Mintaka was still hanging overhead in the twilight. However the wind’s song was sweet and beautiful and seemed to be coming from just outside her window.

Mille went over to her window and almost expected to actually see the wind singing when all of a sudden a brilliant ball of blue and yellow moved onto the closest branch of the tree that stood steadfastly outside her window. The ball fluttered in the filtered morning sun, basking in the limelight, shook its wings triumphantly and crooned even louder.

Mille’s heart missed a beat, as she looked at the most beautiful bird she had ever seen.

His chest was fluffed red and his eyes were a brilliant emerald green. In spite of her presence, the small bird continued singing and before she knew it, Mille was humming along like she had heard this song before. It was so familiar.

Mille and the small bird sat together lost in melody until the sun faded from the day and the deep blue crept across the horizon beckoning Mintaka back above the tower to once again stand guard.

The next day, the bird flew onto the window ledge holding a fresh sprig of rosemary in its beak. Mille held out her hand and the bird carefully dropped it in. It smelt of a long lost spring, of fields not yet explored and of a warm smile.

Every day the bird delivered a small token into Mille’s outstretched hand.

Three small tubed purple flowers, one black feather, a dried maple leaf, half a blue bus ticket, a jacaranda bud, a ripped section of an old newspaper showing the word THIRD and a small seed pod.

Until one day…………….

I am...We Are

I hold the Earth and stand firm.
I nourish my Love will flourish and grow.
I set roots deep in the ground.
I grow tall.
The OAK tree within me gives shelter, shade and protection.
As this OAK I gently bend in the breeze.
I embrace Air and flow and float and refresh and rejuvenate.
My soul and my heart welcome the cleansing wind.
As Air, I whip through the desert and challenge the mountain and the sand.
I bring a scented change and renewal.
I blow all out to sea.
I become the waves and ebb and flow with the tide.
I surge and billow and blow bubbles of joy.
I wash away and wear down.
Cleansing, soothing, flowing and floating I join hands with the moon and be the tide – within and without.
I will not douse the flame – I will soothe and calm.
I become the flame – I am the fire.
I grow bright and magnificent.
I shine and sparkle.
The wind may dim my flame at times but will never extinguish me.
The Sun strengthens me.
The Moonlight recharges me.
The Earth provides fuel for me to burn and feed my fire.
Every moment, each day, I am all elements as the moon watches over and guides me.
There is Love all around me.
I AM the Love.
I let it go and watch it blow away knowing that the tide will return it to me once more.
I am.
I feed my children with Truth and Love.
Through the underwater caves of time, we meet again and again.
They are my parents, my lovers, my soul mates and my friends.
They are my teachers and I am their student.
My home is my crystal cave and my heart is open and filled with light.
The mythology, which breathed life into my body remains, preserved in everything that surrounds me.
Beauty is all around me and it is this gift I share with my family, for they are the sacred circles.
My twin flame is all around me.
In this space and in this time, there is the nothing and the everything.
It is time.
He is the anchor holding onto me while I float away with the tide.
I am the anchor for his wings rooting him to the Earth when he needs nurture and love.
Our two flames together create one bright and blinding light.
If he falls, I will bleed for him.
If I falter, he will breathe for me.
We are healing conduits and connect with the earth for this power to share with humanity.
I am he and he is me.
Together we are Earth and Air and Water and Fire.
Together we are the Love.
We are the Promise and the Purpose.

Under a moon

I stood under a moon with you.

The skies rained with fire as the earth below us bellowed and exploded. You held me and under that final dying moon, we made a pact to always find each other.

Wandering alone for most of eternity, each angel and anchor would appear when voices of desperate prayer would ask. The question would be answered under a full moon in a Spring Equinox. Follow Mintaka and look beneath the dying embers of the once green flame.

My twin flame, separated in darkness, for whom I searched and craved, left alone and afraid. Our two candles together to make one shining flame to light a darkness that enveloped and choked the growing seeds.

The circle of us cannot be broken - this is a sacred bond. All words spoken so far hold the form of us.

This is exactly where I found you.

Now, I stand under another moon and watch for Mintaka and wonder how could I have been so wrong?

My wings lie torn and bleeding. My breath remains trapped beneath the space between the full moon and the dark. How many tears do I need to cry before my heart finally empties itself of all love and begins to harden, crack and die?

I cry. I ache. I am empty. I feel lost. My vision is impaired. I wish to scream. I work. I sleep. I worry. I meditate. I look for Mintaka at night. I wish upon the moon.

It is the deep essence of me which I fear is lost.
It is the dream upon which I am built.
It is the star I have followed, which has changed its direction.
It is the underlying belief of me which I fear has died.
Where do I go from here without those elements of me?
How can I fly when my wings are broken?
How can I speak when my voice has left me?
The circle around me has fallen in on itself and I sit here in the dark and wait for fate to decide.

Nowhere to Go

They have raced down and stomped up
shaking my foundations.
They have slid and slipped and tripped and fallen.
I can still hear the children playing with
the echoes of laughter still ringing.
I can still feel them hanging and running and
jumping and swinging.

I remember one girl.
She stood on me many years ago and contemplated her future with a man who lied.
I held her on my deck and wrapped my arms around her but she couldn’t feel me.
I never felt her again.

For years I lay abandoned and unloved myself.
One man walked down and climbed up
but mostly ignored me.
I fell apart.
He didn’t notice for a long long time.

After many years of neglect,
some strangers used hammers and pulled me apart,
Until all that was left standing were my
old worn out steps.
Steps with Nowhere to Go.

Red

You have colour!
There is colour in this place!
Out of the shades of brown and grey, tendrils of red sneak into the vacuum of apathy emanating from every pore in this place.

We have watched so many moons rise above these plants in your backyard.
Moons, which have dazzled and shone and energised.
Do you know that your moon is in Aries?
The colour of Aries is red.
You have red!You have Red in this place!

Red is ambition and initiative – bravery and courage.
The winters in our lives steal the reds and purples to cheer us up in the middle of our indifference.
Red is the colour of blood and signifies strength and health and passion.
Hidden in the lethargy, you bloomed with these fronds of Red and re energised me.
Now I have Red!
I found Red in this place!